No Resolutions Here

Here I sit in the mostly dark living room.

The girls are watching movies and trying to stay awake to bring in the New Year. I’m pretty sure they’ll make it, and if they don’t I’ll tell them they did.

There’s nothing better than ringing in the new year surrounded by family.

While it’s true that my Husand and FIL are somewhere in Oklahoma, my MIL is across town, my SIL and family are at the beach, and my parents, brother and Gram are all in the High Desert, they’re all here with me.

They’re in my heart and in my memories. I know most people spend tonight making resolutions for the new year about changing for the better. Not me. I mean, I know I could do with a few changes, but a resolution isn’t going to help me to make them.

I’m using tonight as a time of reflection. A time to remember the parties from the past with my parents and neighbors. Parties that lasted well past midnight. Parties where the music was loud, the beer ran freely, and everyone (except us kids) was at least a little drunk. I remember these times and smile.

Those times are so different from my new years of the last 11 years, but they aren’t any better. The last 11 years have mostly been quiet new years. I think my first NYE with Shawn we stayed up until midnight and played Monopoly. I fell asleep with his hand on my belly, I was 19 and four months pregnant with Rapunzel.

I remember new years six years ago. We were all so sick our vacation was extended by 2 1/2 weeks. We spent one of the evenings before new years in the ER. SuperChic was 6 weeks old, running a fever, and not keeping anything down. We definitely did not stay up to midnight that year.

I’ve spent many nights up well past midnight, but in the last 11 years I think most new years I was in bed by ten. Yep, ten, I’m just a party animal.

You know what, I guess there are a few things I want to do in the new year, but they’re not resolutions. They’re things I work on everyday. Some days I may fall a little (or a lot) short, but everyday I try and that’s all that counts.

I want to be the best Mom to my girls as I can be. I want to be the best wife to my Husband I can be. I want to be the best daughter and DIL I can be. I want to be the best sister and SIL I can be. I want to be the best friend I can be. I want to be the best granddaughter, the best niece, and the best Auntie I can be.

If I accomplish all those things. I think I’ll be happy.